G4S to sell juvenile prison to McDonalds

G4S is to sell its Medway juvenile prison to fast food giant McDonalds, it has been announced today. A spokeswoman for G4S said the Medway Secure Training Centre in Kent had seen a fall in profitability due to a recent spate of violence by guards and inmates.

A McDonalds spokesman, speaking exclusively to Newscrasher claimed “for decades we have been renowned for our high quality food that contains important nutritional elements such as water, for our educational projects with children thanks to plastic toy film tie-ins, and Ronald McDonald, an icon among the young. This move into the prison sector is a welcome diversification of our business, and is expected to further enhance our share of the fast-food market.”

“Not only will the inmates be able to enjoy breakfast, lunch and dinner carefully selected by us from the McDonalds menu, they will also enjoy paying their way by working within an adjoining McDonalds restaurant and drive-thru, to be constructed at the expense of the taxpayer.”

The news has been welcomed by Home Secretary Theresa May, whose husband Philip bought a substantial shareholding in McDonalds last week.

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2 thoughts on “G4S to sell juvenile prison to McDonalds”

    1. Thank goodness somebody’s taking the war on crime to the criminals for a change. I welcome this decision, McDonalds should be applauded for this brave departure into providing prisons as well as employment opportunities for those who are involved in the cycle of crime & unemployment. Also,,what an amazing coincidence that Philip May has bought a substantial shareholding in McDonalds… Keep up the good work folks,,,

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