British Prime Minister David Cameron is reported to be in a coma, following a drunken brawl with euroskeptic MP Boris Johnson. It is understood that Mr Cameron suffered a serious head injury in the altercation, during which Mr Johnson is said to called the Prime Minister ‘an absolute rotter’ and ‘the biggest liar in the history of the world’.
Speaking outside the West-End five-star hospital in which the Prime Minister is being treated, Samantha Cameron told reporters: “We would like to thank the vanishingly small number of well-wishers who have sent messages of support for David.”
“It’s heartwarming to know there are still a few people up and down the country whose lives haven’t yet been utterly wrecked by the cruel policies of David’s government.”
Hospital staff said that security had to be stepped up after a member of the public ‘accidentally’ unplugged Mr Cameron’s life-support in order to charge a mobile telephone.
News of Mr Cameron’s misfortune went viral on social media almost immediately, reaching more than 10 million Facebook ‘likes’ in under an hour.