Leading Brexiters who have not yet fled the country have today demanded an end to ‘fact-mongering’ about the economic and social impact of leaving the EU.
Michael Gove, a man insane enough to believe the UK would be better off after shooting itself in the foot, told Newscrasher: “The vote to leave the European Union is a glorious victory for oddball, privately educated Conservative politicians who believe the UK would be better off as an isolated island trading only with itself.”
“But our joy soon turned to grief as unpatriotic media outlets began to ‘fact-monger’ about the immediate negative effects of leaving the EU. Their despicable fact-mongering activity includes reporting on the massive collapse in a variety of business sectors, a plunge in the value of the Pound, and a high likelihood of thousands of job-losses.”
“The continued presence of ‘Project Fact’ is completely unacceptable, and if elected Conservative leader I will immediately outlaw fact-based argumentation in political debates, and I will also make it a legal requirement for school children to be taught both sides of the Brexit controversy.”
Conservative leadership hopeful Andrea Leadsom, who is just as fucking awful, added: “Now that the referendum is over and the British economy is in free-fall, it is treasonous and irresponsible for politicians, experts, and sections of the media to report the facts of what is happening, especially without giving equal time to the ludicrous fantasy version that I and other pro-Brexit idiots would have people believe.”