By Jeff Sanchez and Johnny Zenith
The government’s plan to make Britain look ridiculous on the world stage is a great success, Theresa May has announced.
The announcement comes after Prime Minister met with other leaders from G20 countries, all of whom basically laughed in her face over her ‘courageous decision’ to take the UK out of the European Union against the wishes of the majority of the public, against the wishes of the majority of MPs, and against the advice of the vast majority of academics and economists.
When a journalist asked whether she is really willing to completely destroy the British economy and how she feels about criticism from other world leaders, Mrs May explained that the ‘fingers in ears approach’, among the known symptoms of ‘Gove Disease‘, will serve her well in the coming months.
Watching at home on television, a baby boomer has castigated his adult son for not paying attention to the BBC’s coverage of the G20 summit. Without recognising the irony, leave voter Chris Bumfield said: “Son, you should be watching this because it’s about YOUR future.”
“Of course, by this I mean the dystopian future of virtual slavery I chose for you and all your snowflake friends when I voted to leave the EU.”
“What the youth of today need is to be toughened-up by several decades of totally unnecessary poverty and hardship, while my generation enjoy a quite comfortable retirement with loads of benefits, and hang on to a substantial sum of equity in the house we bought at a rock bottom price in the 1970s or 1980s.”
“I will now proceed to act like it was my generation who fought and won the second world war and, therefore, that we have some kind of moral justification to put the younger generations through this latest round of pure shit.”