Deputy Labour Leader Tom Watson has launched an inquiry into ‘fake Labour politicians’ including himself and all the Blairites, it has emerged.
Mr Watson said: “With my minion Michael Dugher now investigating ways to censor independent left wing media outlets which have dared to expose acts of skullduggery by right wing infiltrators of the Labour Party, I thought it timely to launch an inquiry into ‘fake Labour politicians’.”
“Unfortunately, there is a particular problem with right wing politicians who have infiltrated the Labour Party over a number of years, with the goal of turning it into just another Conservative party. Now that they’ve lost control, they are working tirelessly to ensure the party has no chance to succeed as long as it has a leader with any kind of left wing ideals.”
“Because they do not have anything useful to contribute to he debate on how to help make people’s live better, these ‘fake politicians’ use the right wing media to spread lies and misinformation, which can influence voters in such a way that they often end up voting against their own best interests.”
“It is of utmost importance that we now hold an inquiry into ‘fake Labour politicians’ such as me and all my Blairite co-conspirators, and then blame everything on The Canary, Evolve Politics, and of course Trotskyist arm-twisters like Jeremy Corbyn.”