Everybody must now respect the democratic will of people who were sold a pack of outrageous lies about the benefits of leaving the EU, leading Brexiters have decided.
Speaking outside Parliament, David Davis said: “On the 23rd of June, the people voted for the pack of outrageous lies that I and others sold them. We must now respect the democratic will of the people who we scammed into voting to leave the EU, and anybody who fails to do so is clearly anti-democratic and an enemy of the people.”
Leave voter Chris Bumfield said: “Like many people I want to leave the EU because I am xenophobic and do not like foreigners and non-whites moving to my provincial town, but to save face among my family and friends I needed to find some rational-sounding reasons to vote Leave.”
“Thankfully, Boris and an assortment of other alleged criminals helpfully provided a number of transparent lies that would give racists like me the plausible deniability we needed.”
“Just because the case for leaving the EU was composed entirely of lies, the government should still go through with this purely ideological and hugely destructive constitutional change. This is what democracy is all about.”