War with Spain will secure trade deals and toughen ‘snowflake Remoaners’, claims Government

Going to war with Spain over the status of Gibraltar will help the UK secure better trade deals after Brexit, the Government has claimed.

Speaking exclusively to Newscrasher, Foreign Secretary Boris Johnson said: “I for one welcome the prospect of an all-out war with Spain over the status of Gibraltar. This would make it easier to  secure good trade deals with a number of rich and powerful countries, who would rightly fear British military power again.”

“A good war would have also toughen up those Remain-voting snowflake youngsters by forcing them to experiencing the true horrors of war. The young need to understand what the Baby Boomer generation sacrificed so that Nazism could be defeated in the second world war.”

“And all this talk of war makes for a brilliant distraction from real issues that affect ordinary people’s lives, like the huge rise in living costs that Brexit is causing, and the fact that we have decided to to put even less money into the NHS despite our promise of extra funding.”

Commenting on the prospect of war, in Europe Leave voter Chris Bumfield said: “Everyone likes a good war, don’t they? Especially those of us with a xenophobic disposition and who are too old for military service.”

“I don’t give a fuck about the future of Britain, I just want my blue passport back and our nonsensical system of money back.”

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One thought on “War with Spain will secure trade deals and toughen ‘snowflake Remoaners’, claims Government”

  1. Alas. Many words said in jest in time become the sad new reality. Boris the clown thinks it’s all a big joke if we’re to judge by his sickening smirk. Turd

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