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Brexiteers agree they have lost and will now proceed to get over it

By Dorothy Hotdog and Jeff Sanchez

Brexiteers Boris Johnson, Liam Fox and David Davis have all agreed that they’ve lost and will now proceed to get over it, it has emerged.

In a joint statement, the three Brexiteers wrote: “We now accept that the British courts are right and that parliamentary sovereignty is important. It’s what we have been fighting for all this time, so we will suck it up and get over it.”

“In Parliament there are 470 MPs who oppose Brexit, so clearly we will now be staying in the EU.”

Professor Ed Smythe, a leading scientist in the area of Brexit studies, told Newscrasher: “Our studies have shown that Brexiters are irrational, elderly, and usually poorly educated. They often support homophobia, capital punishment, or believe the ‘EUSSR’ is a Jewish masonic conspiracy to overthrow Britain.”

“Their change in opinion has completely confounded our research. Quite frankly, we’re shocked.”

Leave voter Chris Bumfield from Taunton also said: “Once again the experts are wrong and I am right! Since the day after the referendum I’ve been going around telling Remain voters that they’ve lost, should shut up, and get over it.”

“Now that we Brexiters have basically lost, I’m going to take my own advice and will be shutting the fuck up and getting over it immediately.”

“I hope this finally shows everyone I’m not the colossal twat they originally thought I was.”

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