Brexiters angry as patriotism fails to pay the bills

Morons from around the United Kingdom have today expressed shock and anger after discovering that narrow-minded nationalism is no substitute for actually having a decent economy.

Chris Bryant from Berkshire said: “As a raving xenophobe, I was easily seduced by the neo-fascist oration of Nigel Farage MEP, and subsequently voted to Leave the EU.”

“However, the very next morning I saw the news about our crashing economy and began worry. I went on Google and searched for ‘what is the EU’ and was surprised to learn the EU is not actually a Nazi reich that wants to kill us all, contrary to claims by many prominent Leave campaigners.”

“I now firmly believe that had I not been a gullible, xenophobic moron for the duration of the Brexit referendum campain, I might have voted Remain instead.”

Speaking to Newscrasher, Boris Johnson said: “At the Leave campaign we basically just lied to the public to trick them into voting for Brexit.”

“But now the vote is over and people are expecting to see things like the disappearance of all Poles, or an extra 350 million a week going into the NHS, it’s now politically expedient for me to admit I am in fact a lying twat, and none of my promises will ever come true.”

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