Rupert Murdoch blames real news for decline of his fake news empire

The growing availability of real news is to blame for the falling readership of fake news outlets like the Sun, Rupert Murdoch has claimed.

Dripping pure poison into the ear of a Newscrasher reporter, Murdoch said: “For decades I got away with spreading fake news through the Sun, the News of the World and, to a lesser extent, the Times and Sunday Times.”

“But in recent years social media has allowed people to be more picky about the kind of news and comment they consume, and many people are unfairly choosing honest journalism by media operations that are not owned by utter cunts like me.”

“News Corp made a loss of over 800 million Dollars for the 2017 financial year, for which I blame the large number of social media users who refuse to swallow the sick lies we publish, and who instead choose to get their news from one of the many independent news media websites that have the audacity to publish real news and to hold the Tories to account.”

“Despite the huge losses, I’ll still keep the Sun and my other shit rags in operation because of the political influence the give me, which I use to ruin the lives of ordinary people for my own personal financial gain. The Sun has always been a hard-right propaganda operation that tries to keep the working classes divided and hateful of foreigners and people on benefits, and against left wing policies that would improve their lives.”

“It gives me the biggest raging hard-on to I think I can put the Tories into power, who’ll then utterly destroy the lives of tens of millions of people, especially children and the disabled, and also kill tens of thousands of people by stopping their benefits.”

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